Day 50

Yesterday was Day 50 and it was amazing! I skipped out on a wedding to be a sober mom. The old me would have gotten a babysitter and went to the wedding. I would’ve been drunk by seven, blacked out by ten, and passed out by one in the morning. Today I’d be hurting and out of commission until noon.

Instead I had my husband go to the wedding to represent us. My daughter and I went to Barnes & Noble and spent two hours reading and looking at children’s books. After that we went to Fleet Farm and picked out a harness, lead rope, brush, and apple flavored treats. (I’ll explain later) We grabbed supper in a drive through involving a happy meal, and had a picnic outside under beautiful flowering trees. After we got home we had enough daylight left to go pick agates.

Picking agates is very therapeutic. All you need is a bucket, a good eye for red, and an ear to listen to, “Is this an agate mommy?” I look down at the dusty gray piece of gravel and say, “It’s beautiful!” At least I don’t say “yes” which would be a complete lie. Usually about 1 out of 10 of her treasures are actual agates:)

After agate picking we went to my in-laws house/farm. They were up North at their cabin so we fed the farm cats. Then we chased the four little calves back into the pasture with their mommas. There’s a set of twins in the bunch and they are all spring babies. Sooooo cute!

After an eventful evening we went home again to have our nightly ‘Pajama Party!’ We usually race to see who can get their jammies on first, then I tuck my daughter in and we read books.

I never read a lot and I still do not. I can remember all of the books I’ve read and count them on both hands. I’ve always wished I could get more into books. I never read to my daughter when I was drinking either. I was selfish. The night time was my time. I make up for it all by a lengthy night ritual which we both thoroughly enjoy.

We start with ‘My Little Book About God’ which she always calls ‘bible study’. Then we proceed with ‘The Going to Bed Book’. There’s a page that says…”and when the moon is on the rise, they all go up to…” This is when she yells, “to Extercized?” It’s supposed to be ‘exercise’ and not as a question, but that is the joy of reading to a child. Their interpretation of books is so cute. We then read ‘Five Little Sleepyheads’ and this little prayer book grandpa got her. We complete our extravaganza with a nursery rhyme book. It has all your night time classics like, Twinkle Twinkle, Star Light Star Bright, Diddle Diddle Dumpling, Hush Little Baby, Rock a Bye Baby, Jack be Nimble, and it ends in me singing ‘All Through the Night’. That is what my mom and dad sung me when I was tucked in as a child.

I don’t remember much as small children, but the things I do remember are mostly the good as I am notorious for repressing the bad. I do remember pretending like I fell asleep on the couch watching T.V. so I’d get a free ride to my bedroom. Either mom or dad would scoop me up and carry me to my room to tuck me in. By about the hallway to my room I’d slowly open one eye and peak up to see which one was carrying me. I’d then shut my eye and always feel safe. Usually by the end of my journey I’d open my eyes so they’d see I was awake now. This would by me goodnight song. Then they’d sing, “Sleep my child and peace attend thee, all through the night. Guardian angels God will send thee…” I think that is why I end in this song for my daughter. I want her to have sweet memories of me.

Today will be a good day also. I am bringing home a horse named Skid. I am so excited I could hardly sleep last night! He is a papered miniature horse with black hair and blue eyes, all 34 inches of him. They must be under 36 inches to be classifies as a true mini. He got his name from his silly behavior as a colt. He’d run head on as fast as he could at something and then slide into it as if he were sliding into home plate. He’d always stop about a foot shy of the object and then look up at it.

This is also why he is free to a good home and I decided to adopt him. He tried to ‘skid’ under a fence and got up and there was a fence above him. He panicked and injured his back. Now he has a bump on his back and a horse with a good blood line and papers is worthless to people who show them if they aren’t perfect to look at. A patient where I work raises them. We go get Skid today! I joked with my daughter at Fleet and said, “What in the world are we going to do with all this horse stuff? We don’t have a horse?” She said, “You are silly mom.”

I hope she likes him. If not, I will love and care for him. I grew up with a quarter horse named daisy. Horses are good animals to grow up with. You must earn their respect by proper care. They teach responsibility because the require daily attention. They also teach respect as they can sense fear and won’t listen if disrespected. You must earn their love and affection. Perfect for an only child!

I am so excited! I will post pictures tonight of Skid.