Day 19

April is Alcohol awareness month. How appropriate and ironic that I will be no longer be 30 this month, and I’ll be celebrating my 30th day of sobriety. I have a few goals I like to lay out on the table since this accountability thing is really working for me.

I’d like to continue to pay off debt with the money I save from not buying alcohol and be debt free by 2011. I’d like to get more in touch with my spirituality. I’d like to lose weight. I’d like to read to my daughter more. I’d like to take my daughter to church. I’d like to continue doing research about raising local awareness in teenagers about the consequences of using alcohol. I’d like to set some goals and guidelines with my husband before my blog posse does it for me: ;) And last but definitely not least, I’d like to do all of this while maintaining my sobriety.

I’ve become extremely passionate about the lack of education in our school systems regarding alcohol abuse. I’ve said it before, but I’m walking proof that the D.A.R.E. program just isn’t enough. I got these statistics from the American Academy of Child & Adoleschent Psychiatry’s article ‘Facts for Families’.

“An estimated 20 million adults in the United States abuse alcohol. More than half of these alcoholics started drinking heavily when they were teenagers.  There’s no question that drinking is a problem in most high schools. Alcohol is our most pervasive drug. Teens have access to it at parties, can obtain it from older friends who are of legal age to buy it, or may simply raid their parents’ liquor cabinets. Moreover, unlike drug use, the moderate use of alcohol is considered perfectly acceptable in most adult social circles. Teens see their parents enjoying a cocktail after work or having a glass of wine at dinner. Drinking comes to represent a very sophisticated and adult thing to do mom and Dad do it...why shouldn’t I? the teen may reason. Parental acceptance of moderate to heavy use, however, may send the message that alcohol use has little inherent danger.

All alcohol use by teens should be regarded as dangerous, not only because of the risk of alcoholism but because teen drinkers put themselves in harm’s way. Each year more that 10,000 young people in the United States are killed and 40,000 injured in alcohol-related automobile accidents…”

The statistics are shocking and go on and on. I will have served one of my purposes in life if I somehow impact teenagers by sending the message and leaving horrible real life images in their head of what can eventually happen if they experiment with alcohol.

I need to continue to work on myself for a long time before that goal is accomplished. What kind of research guinea pig would’ve I been if I didn’t suffer several different kinds of pain over the years? Everything happens for a reason, right?

Okay, I’ll end with something a little lighter than all of this. I had an extremely difficult time last year with turning 30 because it just hit me that I was really getting old. I recently found peace in getting older because as we all know, you become wiser. I also accepted being in my 30’s by convincing myself that I would utilize my 30’s as maintenance years; you know, to try and mend what I had abused and damaged in my teenage years and 20’s. Well, it hit me even harder yesterday.

I turn 31 this week. Everything was fine and life was good until I didn’t recognize the goon on the front cover of the people magazine. The headline read, “World’s hottest 16 year old” or something along those lines, and I had no idea who the little twerp was. Not only did I not have a clue who he was, but I thought he was hideous! This is who the girls think is the greatest these days? Then when I joked about who the heck this kid was all the girls in their 20’s knew his name.

Am I getting that old? Ouch! Then I proceeded to tell them that People was way off and that the world’s hottest 16 year old in the world worked at Von Hansen’s, the meat market across the street. They all looked at me like I was their mother talking to them about sex. Ouch again!

Good thing I didn’t tell them that this hot little meat slicer actually made me blush. He asked me if I knew who won the Twin’s game, and when I replied Twins 5-1, he winked at my and smiled like I was ‘the shit’! Oh, and BTW little puma pups, when he asked me what I was doing that evening, I actually hid my left hand and replied, “Oh, you know.” Oh you know! OMG! What the hell kind of lame answer was that? I mean, yes I’m married and yes I’m old and yes I’m overweight and a little rusty on the flirting, but what the hell kind of answer was that?

Don’t worry young girls, this cougar totally redeemed herself when she paid for her meat and hopped in her mini van. The one frickin’ day I park right in front! Argh!

Can you tell I’m getting old and having a pre-mid-life crisis? I considered simple sport’s small talk flirting. I should have my husband read this. I’m clearly deprived of male attention. I’ll catch up with y’all on the big Day 20!